Saturday, March 26, 2011

Abba Goulding and the Deathly Transportation, Parts 1 & 2

Joseph 9:20 pm
How's it goin, dear.

 Katie 9:20 pm
just dandy
except i just realized the amount of work to do that i haven't started on

 Joseph 9:21 pm
Sounds intense.

 Katie 9:21 pm
like i have a paper to write, a proposal to propose, and two books to read

 Joseph 9:22 pm
Better get on it I guess!

 Katie 9:22 pm

 Katie 9:22 pm
that would mean being proactive
and we both know thats not going to happen

 Joseph 9:24 pm
The probability is low.

 Katie 9:24 pm
the paper is only 2 pages
and the proposal will take like half an hour tops
i am a little concerned about the readings

 Joseph 9:25 pm

 Katie 9:25 pm
because they probably wont get finished
but thats no biggie
thats why the invent summaries

 Joseph 9:28 pm
Sounds like a cohearent sentence.
I agree.

 Katie 9:28 pm
i try

 Joseph 9:30 pm
So what are you going to do instead of work?

 Katie 9:30 pm
uh sit here and stumble upon great stuff

 Joseph 9:31 pm

 Katie 9:32 pm
how are you my friend?

 Joseph 9:32 pm
It all started with sideboob.

 Katie 9:32 pm
you mean mine? the one you poked in history?

 Joseph 9:32 pm
Is there any other?

 Katie 9:32 pm

 Joseph 9:37 pm
Nor will there ever be >:|

 Katie 9:37 pm
i meant to ask "How are you, my friend?"

 Joseph 9:38 pm
I tragically mock your lack of comma sense.

 Katie 9:38 pm
i know
i hate you

 Joseph 9:38 pm
So anyways.
You probably don't know who Ellie Goulding is, but I saw her live last night.

 Katie 9:38 pm

 Joseph 9:38 pm
MONDO cool.
saw a concert

 Joseph 9:39 pm
met a musician
became a minority
got yelled at by an arab

 Katie 9:39 pm
woot woot!

 Joseph 9:40 pm
So I went to go meet Beth and our friend Sara, who went to Octorara, at 30th Street station.
They were taking the R5 in.

 Joseph 9:41 pm
And I get to the subway to get some tokens and for some reason my stupid ass only brought 3 dollars when I know that 3.10 gets you two tokens from the machine.
I awkwardly stood staring at the machine and asked the person beside me if they had a dime.
Dude totally faked me out with "Dang I only have 8 cents!"
"WAIT. Jk, here's two nickels."

 Katie 9:42 pm

 Joseph 9:42 pm
I almost had a heart attack.
So then I go through the gate and went to put my earphones back in aaaaaaand
I notice that the right rubber ear thing is missing from the headphone.

 Joseph 9:43 pm

 Katie 9:43 pm
aaaahhh i hate that

 Joseph 9:44 pm
Yeah, so the whole trip I had to deal with Kesha in the left ear and the musical stylings  of unknown rapping noises from a distant iPod that was way too loud for anyones own good.

 Katie 9:44 pm
i haaaate that so much

 Joseph 9:45 pm
So I get to 30th Street eventually and meet up with Beth and Sara.

 Joseph 9:45 pm
Beth who is wearing tights and Sara who is in flipflops and a skirt.
It was cold as Santa's balls last night.
I don't know how they survived after what we went through.

 Katie 9:46 pm
Why were they wearing those kind of clothes? Makes absolutely no sense

 Joseph 9:47 pm
Hell if I know.
They explained it to me but I was too busy trying to pronounce the name of this random italian pub.

 Joseph 9:47 pm
Was it Silante?

 Katie 9:48 pm

 Joseph 9:48 pm
Whatever. I'm calling it cilantro.

 Katie 9:49 pm
i just spent like 10 minutes trying to phonetically spell it out but then I remembered that I dont care and gave up

 Joseph 9:49 pm
Atta girl.
Apparently it means 'Cheers' in Irish.
Not Italian.

 Katie 9:49 pm

 Joseph 9:49 pm
Italian bars?
I'm a stupid bitch.
Well in any case, we made it to the World Cafe Live.
Which sounds like a TV special.
But is actually a cafe/bar.

 Katie 9:50 pm

 Joseph 9:50 pm
So the thing started at 8 but we figured Ellie wouldn't be on until 9 because they had a...
What's it called?
Opening band.

 Katie 9:51 pm
opening act

 Joseph 9:51 pm

 Joseph 9:51 pm
Which wasn't a band so much as it was two guys banging on drums and synths for a straight hour with familiar beats from our childhood.

 Katie 9:52 pm
sounds like a typical garage band

 Joseph 9:52 pm
They probably smelled. I don't know.
So instead of watching that hot mess, we stayed on the first floor and got some food.
Then we made it down a few floors to the actually performance area.
So we got our wristbands on and we're about to walk in when this random ass lady emerges from the corner of the shadows
I flip shit and cower in fear at this sudden batmanesque figure.

 Joseph 9:54 pm
She goes, "DID YOU GUYS KNOW...You can buy her CD and get it signed after the show?!"
Five minutes later we walk into the room with CD's in hand waiting for the opening act to finish.
This place is boss, btw.
There was a bar and a line of tables in the back.
In the front was the stage and in between was a biiiig floor area full of people.
It was awesome.
And around 9:15, my girl Ellie rolls out looking fly as hell singing her face off.
It was amazing.
Like, you need to be introduced soon.

 Joseph 9:56 pm
She was awesome live.

 Katie 9:56 pm
oooh sounds like fun!

 Joseph 9:56 pm
It was! It was a blast! I put pictures and a video on FB btw.
Okay, except.
We had to situate our standing area a few times because Beth is vertically challenged and there were tall people all up in our business.
And I ended up behind this guy whose dance moves primarily consisted of what I can only describe as rapid hip thrusts.

 Joseph 9:58 pm
The beat would be going and this guy would just throw his hips forward and backwards wildly.

 Katie 9:59 pm
that is most unfortunate

 Joseph 9:59 pm
And every damn time his butt would punch me in the crotch.
Like, no sir.
I'm sorry.
That's not dancing.
That's awkward sex.
And I'm not having it.

 Katie 9:59 pm
so much grossness

 Joseph 10:00 pm
So it came to a point where as he was throwing it back, I threw my hip forward.
I was like, "HUUUUUH!"

 Joseph 10:00 pm
So he pretty much stopped after that.

 Katie 10:01 pm
yeah, you showed him!

 Joseph 10:01 pm
And then there was this dumb girl behind me that kept hitting my ass with her purse because she kept turning to dance with her man and then back to watch Ellie.
Pick a place of interest.
So that happened.

 Joseph 10:03 pm
It ended around 10:20 and the line for the CD signing appeared heading into a door to the side of the stage.
We hung back and sat at one of the tables to rest our weary feet.
Our logic was that if we were the last ones, we would get to talk to her more.
That didn't happen.
She looked really exhausted.
So I was like, "Hi!"
And I threw her on the table and now we're engaged.

 Katie 10:04 pm
are you checking to see that i am paying attention?

 Joseph 10:04 pm

 Joseph 10:05 pm
So I was like, "Hi!"
And she was like, "Thanks for coming!"
And she signed the CD.
And we took a pic.
And I was like, "The show was great by the way."
And she was like, "Aww, thanks! Have a good night, hun!"

 Katie 10:05 pm
she was probably envisioning stabbing you in the eye with a pen

 Joseph 10:05 pm
I wouldn't put it past her.
She saiiiiid she had a great time in 'Philli' so I doubt that.
Anyway, we made it out of WCL and we were walking back to 30th street to get back to my apt.
And we get down to the subway and we're waiting.
And we're waiting.
Beth is being entertained by the rats running around on the tracks.

 Joseph 10:07 pm
And we're waiting even more.
And I'm getting nervous that this train is never going to get here.
But fear not, fair maiden.
It arrived.
But it did.
And we rode the MFL down to City Hall so we could take the BSL to Girard.
That didn't happen.
No it surely did not.
What had happen was this.
1) We got off at City Hall and walked a few feet to the stairs going down to the Northbound Broad Street train.

 Joseph 10:09 pm
2) We waited there forever.
3) Miraculously, more and more people flooded down.
4) Loud rapping noises and loud screaming talks about weaves.
5) Beth feared for her life.
6) Sara fell asleep.
7) The train just never came.

 Katie 10:10 pm
Beth should probably go into the city more often if she is scared of weaves

 Joseph 10:10 pm
Yes, because that's what she was scared of.
If you've ever taken the subway in philly, some stations have an Express and Local line.
Express has way less stops than local and gets right to the end of the line.

 Joseph 10:11 pm
Express trains were the only ones coming.
Which is not what we wanted.
So it's frickin' 12:30 at night and there are three kids sitting waiting for the train at City Hall.
Something's not right here.
So I go upstairs to ask the person in the booth what was go-
Why are the doors locked?
Is there a chain around that gate?
Guys, I don't think the train is coming.
Uhhh...let's try this way.
No, Sara, it's okay.
I'll just call the police if we're locked in.
We're fine, guys.

 Katie 10:13 pm
ooooonly you

 Joseph 10:13 pm
Yeah yeah yeah, etc.
So we eventually make it to the MFL and find an exit.
I scurry to find where we are and I whistle down a taxi.
We get in and I'm like, "15th and Master, please."
Dude has the toll starting at $2.70.
I let it slide because I just didn't care anymore.
Dude is on his bluetooth the whole time.
Dude keeps driving past Master.
Dude eventually turns around and asks if we're here yet.
I tell him, "Just drop us off here."
So he pulls over to the next lane and SURPRISE.
There's a car there, dumbass.
So we all almost die.

 Katie 10:15 pm

 Joseph 10:15 pm
And we finally make it to the sidewalk.
And I pay with my credit card.

 Joseph 10:15 pm
Which is apparently bad?
Because he's like, "*mumblearabicmuble* Y U NO TELL ME U USING CARD?!"

 Katie 10:15 pm
you were probably just not meant to live last night

 Joseph 10:15 pm
I was just like, "IS THAT OKAY WITH YOU. I just have a CARD."
Angry arab was just swearing it up and I looked at him and I was like
So can I use my card or not?
And we do.
And I say something bad to him in Arabic.

 Katie 10:16 pm
did he hear you?!

 Joseph 10:17 pm
I assumed because he hit the gas so hard and got the FUUUUUUUU- out of there.

 Katie 10:17 pm
or he just hated you to begin with

 Joseph 10:18 pm
Well whatever the case was, we were three blocks past my apartment.
And we begrudgingly walked back.
It was one block past where we saw Easy A at that theater.

 Katie 10:19 pm
holy shiz muffins

 Joseph 10:19 pm
It was not cool, yo.

 Joseph 10:19 pm
So anyway, we get there and before going to the concert, I let Erica come have the apartment because she needed to study for her orgo test.
We're in different lectures.
And I tell her about it.
And she's like, "You do know that the express stops at Girard, right?"
So then she went back to her place and I set up everything and they slept over.
We went to bed at 2am.

 Katie 10:20 pm

 Joseph 10:20 pm
And we woke up at 8:30am.
They needed to catch the 9:30 R5 outta here.
And so we gathered our wits and made it across campus. We stopped by a coffee place to perk us up and continued our cold journey to the station.

 Joseph 10:21 pm
We get there and the train arrives.
Sara goes, "I don't care if this is the wrong one. We're getting on it right now."
Hah. So I just laugh and give them hugs.
Bon voyage, etc.

 Katie 10:22 pm
aww very cute
but oh so depressing

 Joseph 10:22 pm
Yeah, you'd think that's it.
You'd like that, WOULDN'T YOU D:<
That was not it.
I look at the e-info sign.
They got on the wrong train.

 Katie 10:23 pm
hahahaha noooo

 Joseph 10:23 pm
So I quickly text Beth and tell her to just get off at City Hall and switch trains.

 Joseph 10:23 pm
And I walk out of the station with my headphones in my ear.
I replaced the right earbud.
But failed to reinsert my memory card in my phone prior to leaving.
So no music.
I was left with headphones in my ear for nothing.

 Katie 10:24 pm
please stop failing

 Joseph 10:25 pm
I stopped in my tracks, laughed at my fortune, and then took a sip of coffee while trying my damnest to get "Take a Chance On Me" out of my head.
Ask me how that ABBA song got stuck in my head.

 Katie 10:27 pm
no idea

 Joseph 10:27 pm
Seriously, ask me.

 Katie 10:27 pm

 Joseph 10:27 pm

No comments:

Post a Comment